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The Good and Equally Bad Dilemma

22 Mar

If you had money to spend, what would you do with it? Would you rather go on holiday or shop away your heart’s content? Don’t tell me you’d do both because that amount of money you have is only enough for a budget holiday or a shopping splurge.

I am torn between Bali or the bag. You must think I’m crazy for desiring a bag with such hefty price tag but at least I don’t gamble away all my money or waste them on unnecessary stuff. As my friend puts it, it is an investment.

Then again, maybe I don’t need a holiday nor a bag. It would be wiser if I just continue to save money, wouldn’t it?

The future is bleak and without money, one could barely survive.



17 Mar

Why do some people do things in an extreme manner? It’s simple really, because there’s always a reason.

Alcoholics drink because they want to run away from reality.

Shopaholics shop away because they can’t seem to fill in that emptiness in their life.

People eat (or overeat for that matter) to find some comfort to ease their pain.

Casanovas leave their lovers heartbroken because they are afraid of commitment.

They say that without love, life would be meaningless. Love makes the world goes round. Love is everything and yet, love is one of the many reason why people do things in an extreme manner.

Love is a blessing and a curse at the same time. Love is both easy and hard.

Love is like water. Too much of it can drown you and too little, can deprive you of any livelihood.

Sometimes I wish I was a robot. It would be easier to live life without any emotions or feelings etc, wouldn’t it?



10 Jan

Hello there. Sorry for not blogging so often like I did last year. Somehow, reality managed to catch up on me. I’m tied to a few things which prevent me from blogging daily. Well, I’m now back to porridge.

2011 started with me down with the annual fever. You name it, I have it all. I’ve been to Normah a few days back and paid RM50 for medicines I could have bought on my own for less than that. Pfft.

Last week I went to settle my university fee and I ended up being very late. To the point that I have to see the Dean. No thanks to Dad. I had to look for the money myself. It was barely enough to cover for the whole fee. Sighs.

That’s why I aim to finish university as soon as I can. I am sick of this life.

I have no idea what’s making me feel so lost. It only happens when I’m back home, I get so depressed.

Oh well, just five more months left, I’m sure I’ll get out of this maze soon and start a completely new life.



Anxiety and Uncertainty

2 Jan

Looking far into the distance, wondering what the future has in store for me

Of Weight Issues

23 Nov

Whenever I am feeling negative, I usually think of the next holiday in my calendar. The closest one right now will be the Christmas holiday in December.

Probably it’s that feeling whereby it’s almost the end of the year. It makes me feel so sick with life at the moment. 2010 almost reaches its end and I feel like I am still not doing my best for the resolutions this year.

One of my resolution this year is to lose weight. I know it’s too early to be proud of my achievement but I’ve lost 19 kg since the program started in June.

It was quite a last minute ordeal. The reason why I was so determined to lose weight was due to health reasons. I had a medical check up in Normah. Apart from being overweight, my blood pressure was horrible too. I was beyond my ideal weight.

It scared me terribly as being that heavy, I was so vulnerable to diseases. I hate looking at my ugly self on the mirror. I feel extremely ugly. I found it hard to find anything that fitted me nicely. I feared that Aslan would leave me for someone else more beautiful and skinny than me. I was paranoid. I didn’t sleep well. Every night I wished I could removed all the fat. I realised fat won’t just disappear.

Then, the diet started. I began my healthy lifestyle. I exercised daily. I ate moderately and healthily. I removed beef, rice, mayonnaise etc unhealthy from my diet and totally banished dinner and snacking from my life.

During the first few months, I was so obsessed with losing weight, I did a liquid diet. I didn’t take any solids for a month plus and I managed to lose 10 kg from that crazy act alone.

I became smarter and decided to lose weight healthily by controlled eating and exercise but nevertheless, dinner became nonexistent for me.

Today, I’m still fighting that war and although I’m slowing down a bit, it doesn’t mean I am giving up on it entirely.


Blood, Sweat and Tears

7 Nov |ˈlīər|
noun a person who tells lies

I find liars annoying.

insincere and deceitful

I don’t like two-faced people.

Combined these two and here comes the ultimate enemy, a lying backstabber. And oh how I loathe one.

I loathe their so-called music: hate, detest, abhor, execrate, have a strong aversion to, feel repugnance toward, not be able to bear/stand, be repelled by

Lies she said about me:

  1. She funded me my online business Wardrobe Circus and she was the one who flew to Singapore to buy the clothing>> In her dreams! Wardrobe Circus was funded by Aslan and I, each contributing 50% to the decided capital. We were in Singapore for Easter and took that opportunity to stock up for the boutique. I hand-picked all of the items myself! That MF still owe me money for one dress!!!
  2. She said I always like to borrow her ‘branded items’ and never return them>> Woman, your branded items were always always ALWAYS from Tebedu or Serikin! FU for saying I always take them and never return! In fact, you were the one who always offered to give your things away, which, I never took anyway!

her two-faced ex: deceitful, insincere, double-dealing, hypocritical, backstabbing, false, fickle, untrustworthy, duplicitous, deceiving, dissembling, dishonest;disloyal, treacherous, faithless, traitorous, cheating, lying, weaselly; literary perfidious

How she is a backstabber:

All these years I’ve known her, I’ve always been a nice person to her. My sympathy for her was genuine. I helped her because I was honest to help. I cared for her. I treated her like family. I expect nothing in return. Then I found out that she’d been making stories behind my back

She said I always bring her out to meet boys>> Oh is that so? I thought she was always the ‘hot stuff ‘of Kuching for ages? When I was younger, every time I brought her out, my intention was exactly that. I just wanted to entertain her by bringing her around town with me. I pitied her when she always complained she was bored at home. I was really heartbroken when she said otherwise about me. She took advantage of my honesty.

I don’t know how she thinks she can get away with this but hey, you do something bad, it all comes back to you. I’m just gonna let this be off the hook because seriously, I think it’s not worth it. After all she’d done, no one would believe her. So long I have the truth with me, I don’t give a damn about what she said.

Besides, it just shows how much her life sucks by talking about mine all the time.


P/S: She even made my family looks bad. I’m really angered by her. I never want to be associated with her, ever!



I miss…

16 Oct

My ‘I’m-on-a-holiday’ face

I couldn’t be any happier, or could I?


I want a freaking holiday!


How to get rid of Bad Mood

16 Oct

1. Eat chocolate or any sweet stuff

2. Exercise those negative feelings away

3. Listen to angry or any related emotional songs and sing your heart out

4. Buy cheap dishes etc that is breakable and destroy them

5. Play the Sims and make a character based on the person who gave you the bad mood at the first place and see him/her die

6. Bake a cake and eat it

7. Go shopping

8. Print out a picture of the person that gave you the bad mood at the first place and deface it

9. Watch sad videos of how there are other people more unfortunate than you

10. Have a nice relaxing bath with aromatherapy and all that new age sht

11. Drive really fast like you’re life counting on it on a not so busy road

12. Do some gardening

13. Watch water in a pot until it boils

14. Record yourself ranting/btching/sulking etc about whatever started the bad mood and then play it either in fast or slow mode

15. Go to the nearest beach and have some time alone from the world

16. Box a dummy imagining it’s the person who started the bad mood instead

17. Meditate, pray and talk to God.

18. Have an argument with yourself by looking at your own reflection on the mirror

19. Spend some time with your pet

20. Cocoon yourself from the world by staying in your room, switch all telecommunication device and think about happy times

21. Move your bed to a corner where you will never wake up on the wrong side of the bed any more.

Why am I typing this? I’m having a major bad mood and I’ll try all of the methods mentioned to see which one works the best.



Sour Tape

15 Oct

I bet your tongue swells looking at this photo.

Photo Credit: Jessica McDougall

Life can be like a sour tape sometimes. Sour at first and then sweet to the end or at least until you’ve finished the last tape lah.

Philosophy aside, I love sour tape. After we tried changing our flight schedule yesterday at Air Asia (But failed), we went to Famous Amos and I couldn’t resist them. I bought one in every color.

Sour tapes! I love Strawberry flavor. Mmm...



When things don’t go according to plan

13 Oct

I woke up to bad news. I just have to go along with the new plan and hope it won’t abandon me like the last one did. Anticipation can be so deceiving sometimes. I knew it was wrong to be happy about it.